For Sale!!! SOON

I am VERY proud of this new adventure and would like to tell you all about it. This was a simple project that turned into something that I wasn't quite expecting. Again, just trying to roll with it. A couple of weeks again I brought out the Diego neon finger paints and was determined to have both boys sit down on the kitchen floor and do some good old, messy finger painting. Trevor was game as always. Darren wasn't quite interested at first, that's putting it kindly, but once he was MADE to do it...he tolerated it. He likes squeezing the paint out....dipping his fingertip in it....but would them want it off. It took him some time to be willing to let me put his entire hand in it and smear it around. Eventually we completed two very large pieces of paper. They were very colorful and happy...especially knowing the effort it took for the project to be completed!

Couple of days later we ripped up the artwork...on purpose, mind you. My mom is an artist who does this kind of stuff. Every time we are visiting, she takes the artwork created by the boys and turns into neat cards. Feeling somewhat inspired, I thought, "maybe we can do that too!" So they ripped up the art work the way "true artists would" and I told them to just glue the pieces on the cards. When I stood them on the counter to dry...I just kept looking at them. They were really cute! But they needed a little something. A long time ago I had purchase these little stickers at Michael's that had inspiring words and phrases on them.... Believe, Dare to Dream, Make a Wish...etc. PERFECT!!! And as l looked at each card individually, I picked the appropriate title. I fell in love with all of them. On the back of the cards I have added a picture of the boys and this little write up:
This card was created by our "Wonder Twins". Darren is autistic, Trevor is not. Yet, together they live with, battle, and break down the walls of Autism with good ole' brotherly love.
My thoughts are 1 for $5
5 for $20
8 for $25
Something like that???????????????????????????
Any money made would go towards Darren's therapies and expenses. As always...input needed.

We're Playing Bas-ket-ball

Does anyone actually know that song???

Well we have been playing basketball. Darren is definitely a post player and Trevor is a natural gunner. In my last post I was talking about sports camps for kids. So I figured I'd better put myself to the test. Can I teach Darren how to play basketball or any sport? So off to Toys R Us we went. We got a new basketball hoop, plastic hockey sticks, fresh new bouncy balls, and all other necessary equipment. The first day of basketball we were outside. The goal was for Darren to just get the ball and slam dunk it without whining. That took awhile. But it eventually did happen. So then he had to get the ball, dunk it, high five Trevor, and sit down.....with as little whining as possible. Again, it took some time. BUT he can do it. He's also a perfectionist. He has to make the shot...if he misses...he, on his own, will get the ball and try again. I liked that.

Trevor used to shoot baskets all the time as a toddler. Seriously, the kid was so good. Watch the video and see for yourselves!!! It had been awhile since we had really played, so his form was rusty. What I love about Trevor is that he really does listen to what I say...even if he's mad...or determined that he is right...he listens and eventually WILL try.

Round 2: Last night we tried again. My initial goal was to have Darren catch the ball, turn, and dunk. If he did so, he would then receive his beloved frog as a reward. I would say catch and he attempted to say CATCH. Cool. I was even more surprised when he caught it! I then told him to shoot, he did and then went to where is frog was and say, "FR-OGG". For those that have heard him say frog...it's too darn cute!!! Wow, this is working. Next he had to catch it, shoot it, get the ball, and pass it to Trevor. Mission accomplished. "FR-OGGG".

Thank god for Trevor. He is my biggest helper and support. I can't explain to you all how much this four year old helps me on a day to day basis. What a team.

Sword Fight!!

I am going to keep this one brief. Darren's imitation skills are really sky rocketing! When we are with friends now...not only does he hang around them...he is starting to participate in what everyone is playing. Great improvement. We are blessed with friends that are accepting and patient. More video to come...we are working on learning hockey, basketball, and riding a big wheel. Stay tuned!

Keep Going Home

My creative juices are flowing these days. I have SO many ideas and dreams. I watched the movie " Pursuit of Happyness" today. I never thought about the concept and reality of the actual Pursuit. So true, our fore fathers were right on. Another book that hit me hard was " I will not die an unlived life" by Dawna Markova. I feel that I am in pursuit of my purpose. So when I get these spurts...I go with it. I am trying to be in the moment. Even though I live it, I know that there is a special lesson to be learned from my boys. Their unique circumstances mean something. What if other kids and families could benefit from this type of situation. Fairfax County is wonderful. Darren is in the Pre-School Autism Class and has benefited greatly. BUT what if there wasn't the " Trevor Factor"? Darren has the opportunity to be around a same age peer all the time. Major benefit when it comes to dealing with Autism. What if other kids could have the same chance??? The idea of developing such a thing has been inspiring me lately...some sort of school or before and after school center????

I am also a sports kinda gal. What options will I have for Darren? Trevor could possibly start sports next year...what about Darren's choices??? Darren on the sidelines just isn't gonna be enough for me and it shouldn't be for any parent with a special needs child. Why couldn't they learn to play sports at an early age like the rest? Could take A LOT of practice...but what doesn't? The thought of some camps...for the younger guys...REALLY excites me.

This is what I mean by coming home...I know what passions I can bring to the table. I love sports, music, and kids. I have learned how important these early years are for kids. Childhood is so important. It's what make us, shapes us, and grounds us in the future.

Any feedback on these ideas would be greatly appreciated....SERIOUSLY

T-Bucket

Who does this to their child?

My sweet, sweet boy

Trevor....Oh Trevor. My sweet and sensitive child. His soul is kind, his determination strong. Trevor is such a little Italian boy. I sometimes say that I should have named him Carmine, or Anthony cause the kid loves pasta, makes everyone feel welcomed, and is stubborn as a mule. My grandma Rose would have loved this child. Truth is, most everyone loves this boy. There's just something about him that is special. Trevor is a feeler. He can walk into a room and sense the mood...and adjusts to it. I think he can really tell between the kids that like him and the kids who think he's too small to play ball...little do those kids know how darn good he is!!! But he adjusts. We all know the benefits that Darren is reaping because of his wonderful brother. Trevor is so patient and kind, and most importantly...accepting of his brother. He knows Darren is different in some way, but he loves him with all of his heart and soul. When TREVOR says something to Darren, Darren listens and will follow him, pee with him:), or repeat him. It's a wonderful thing to see. I also think that Trevor has benefited from Darren as well. Trevor has learned at a very early age the ability to pick up on non-verbal cues, body language, and underlying emotion. The "Autism Whisperer" of sorts. These are things that are almost impossible to teach...but he's had to adjust...and he makes it work...and because of that...he makes miracles happen. Maybe that sounds over the top. But I see it all the time.

AND Trevor loves his Daddy. They have wonderful bond and understanding of one another. I imagine that Mark was a lot like Trevor when he was young. I think that because of this, Mark is more protective of Trevor. I am probably more protective of Darren. Balance. It's what makes it all work I guess. I am already in awe of Trevor. He has more personality, and talent, and IT than I could ever imagine in a 4 year old. Proud doesn't even cut it. I can't wait to watch his life unfold....many more great things to come !!!!

It Hit the Floor, Not the Fan

I know that I said that I would be writing about Trevor next. I promise that I will. But we have some VERY exciting news to share. Last night, Darren peed in the potty 5 times!!!!!! And of course, there is a story that goes along with it. A very funny story indeed. It was around 2:30 yesterday afternoon. My day had already been scattered. So as Trevor played outside, while I unloaded groceries...Darren was playing with his toys in the other room. Or so I THOUGHT! As I rounded the corner, I sensed trouble. Darren had taken off his diaper and pooped on the floor. Not the hardwood floor mind you, the CARPET. I was furious!!!!! I must say that I think one the things that I have always done well is that I treat Darren like I would any other child. That being said, I was furious!!!! I took his hand and told him that poop and pee-pee go in the potty from now on and that he needed to sit on the potty while mommy cleaned up this mess. Needless to say, Stone Cold Darren Dieste did not move. He knew exactly what he had done and that I was mad. Potty training Darren was not on my Monday afternoon agenda. But I had to make a point. I went upstairs, grabbed some underwear, set the timer and started putting him on the potty every 30 min. Once he got there, I made him sit for 5 minutes. The determination that took over my body is unexplainable. After 2 hours of this...a miracle occurred. He went!!! I was SOOO excited, I can't believe that anyone reading this didn't hear me screaming! "YOU DID IT...YOU DID IT!!!! He was just as happy...and was attempting to say the same....DD-DD. What a moment. He peed four more times last night, and tried twice this morning. He knows it's a big deal and I can tell that he feels like a big boy. HOORAY for Darren! HOORAY!!!

Connection

No Doubt...

We belong together

Children bring such perspective to our lives. I am going to talk about just Darren today. Trevor will have his own write up next. Fair and balanced:) Amidst all that has transpired with Darren, I love this child deeply, with all my heart and soul. I admire him. I watch my four year old get on a bus everyday...and I await his big brown eyes to arrive home in the afternoon. Our connection is deep. I always say that Darren isn't a typical anything. Yes he lives with autism, but he lives. He is a happy soul, who loves to laugh and play, who kisses AFFECTIONATELY, who enjoys being around people, and who can connect with others. What is typically autistic about that? Working with Darren is such a learning experience. All children learn so differently, but Darren's delays are so obvious in certain areas. I watch him intently when I ask him to label the flash cards shown...I literally watch the wheels turn...his eyes scanning...mind processing....mouth/hands starting to move....then a response. SO much work for him. I remind myself constantly, " He can't talk" imagine how frustrating that is. The thing is, that we do know in a way. Think of all the times that we "emotionally" have things to say...but can't...due to fear of hurting someones feelings or fear of letting your true passions be revealed. WHATEVER the case may be, when the moment passes, you feel frustrated with yourself. You weren't able to speak your mind. Darren just experiences this a 100 times a day. So why is he so happy? Maybe because it's all that he has every known. Maybe because as he learns even one new sign, or makes one connection, some of that frustration is released. There's one thing for sure, he is loved, and I know he feels it. Would I like for him to talk?...of course. Will I be devastated if he doesn't....absolutely not. He already communicates so much to me and to others. I just want to make sure that we are providing him with every opportunity to reach his potential. And he's got plenty of it!!!!!