Summer Realizations

 This summer has been action packed. Our trip to NC was our first adventure. I learned a lot about Darren during that visit. I used that time to get back in touch with Darren's academics and behaviors. It's hard to explain, but if I'm not totally in tune with him...we both lose our balance. He acts out more...I lose the vision...and we just don't function as well. Jamie once called us "ET and Elliot".  I have to agree that our relationship is like that. Who's ET? and Who's Elliot? It depends on the situation:) In NC Darren and I reconnected. The first day, as is typical...he pushed the limits. It usually takes a couple of time outs and some consistency to get him back on track. But he can escalate quickly. He gets so wound up that it is hard for him to regulate his emotions. So I have to try very hard not to get too emotional when dealing with him. At home I can ignore him or put him in his room and let him have his fit and recover from there...but at someone else's house...it isn't that easy. So after many attempts at time out at my parents...he started hitting me..spitting...scratching...the same old M.O. It was like he knew that I couldn't ignore him here AND like I stated....we were already out of sync.  It is these moments that I hate the most. The power struggles. But it is at these moments that I have to step up and take control. Ever watch The Dog Whisperer??? When the angry dog finally surrenders and becomes submissive...it's kinda like that. There is a switch...where he goes from angry/silly boy to sorrowful/ apologetic child. It's not fun...but every so often...it happens. He tested me a couple of times there but I was also doing some academics with him...he doesn't like it when his worlds collide. And then...we are back on track. ET and Elliot.
Academics: I was actually impressed with his progress. His reading is coming along...slowly but surely. He struggles with word recall. Sometimes it looks like he is scrolling through his word rolladex and unfortunally the rolladex is empty. With the words he just couldn't remember...I started incorporating sign language to hopefully serve as an independent prompt. If you look back at the NC videos you can see the little spark that goes off as he uses it...it helped him remember then word...and he smiles. I have shared this with school and they are on board with continuing this. Hey..."whatever works" is my philosophy. We also hope to use the iPad more at school to expand his communication skills. The gap between his receptive and expressive language is still his biggest hurdle. I have great hope that this year we can close that gap a little. He loves his iPad. He watches educational videos on youtube a lot! The funny thing is that we have no idea how he finds the things that he does. For example...he will watch Head Shoulder Knees and Toes...and then he will listen to it in Japanese....so funny.
Behaviors: All in all. He has come such a long way. I just really wish he could verbally express his emotions. I believe that would help him greatly. He still gives the warning call: "I want to scream" or "I'm crying". If I ask him why..it's usually..."I'm sad" or simply "because..I'm crying". I am happy that he is trying to express himself...it's a positive start.

Summer is also a time for the boys to reconnect. There are so lucky to have each other. They both are giving such lifelong
gifts to each other...and they don't even know it yet:)

Trevor has been enjoying his summer. Please check out the new Batman video below.  Trevor continues to be a fun loving kid. We have decided not to partake in travel baseball this fall. Not sure we are ready for that commitment. Trevor has expressed interested in more golf and/or tennis lessons and he really wants to play basketball again...then baseball in the Spring. Hard to believe that they will be going into 3rd grade. School starts August 20! Not that far off.

We hope that everyone is enjoying their summer.
GO USA!!!